Childhood Memory

My most cherished childhood memory. I don't think I really have one. I remember seeing kids fight, being hit for misbehaving, watching tv at dinner, being force to read books I didn't care about, I remember people watching at 5, I remember my best friend Kelci's third birthday party. I remember my mom being at my daycare when I was four. I remember people telling me they saw me on tv because I was in a music video I didn't know was being taped. I remember going to Niagara Falls and seeing new family members. I remember having a horrible little sister. I remember the not so good things and the good things. Nothing really stands out. I remember wanted to be best friends with Samantha and wanting to get to know Norma. Both came true. I remember seeing a girl have a seizure in school. I remember having sleep overs. I remember when I use to have a bunk bed. I remember when we use to have a rocking chair, a rocking horse, a red room, a black cat. I remember laying down and watching the full moon while everyone slept. This is my childhood, little bits and pieces of memories.

Crush

My first crush was in tenth grade. I had a crush on this guy from my after school program. I don't even know why I had it. It was just so stupid now that I think about it. I would obsess over him and want him to like me and think I was cool but I don't remember what it was about him that made me think and do such stupid things back then. If I could change my past I would. I feel like all my worrying and love note writing and giggling was all a waste. Anyway, what I do remember is that I liked his hair. He did have nice hair. We had some common interests. And that's about it. We had one friend in common, and I remember hanging together a lot. I taught them Japanese or what I could teach them. And I remember we did go out once, but ended up switching dates at the end of it with my best friend at the time. Yea, it was very weird. And now he's gay and happily in a committed relationship while I'm still single but not bitter about it at all. I do regret all the time I spent doing all those little childish things but I was a child and part of being a child is making mistakes and learning from them. So in part I am glad I had it but still wish I hadn't done some of the things I did. Oh well, you only live once.

Food!

My last food craving was sometime last week, when doing random things. I just get this craving for grilled cheese. I use to make it all the time when I was a freshman in college. I got it down to an exact science with the right bread for the perfect amount of cheese. It was awesome. I miss being a freshman. Now I'm a grad student that needs money to pay for college and to pay back to loans she has after she graduates. Being in the real world kinda sucks. I can talk to people I want when I want or do what I want when I want. Everything has consequences and you have tons of responsibilities. Enjoy your time as much as you can. I know I will.

Beliefs

My religious beliefs are that I believe in Jesus Christ. And that has pretty much stayed the same. But the thing of Christianity is that you grow more in faith. God works and moves in your life and is constantly showing you how wonderful He is and how much He loves you. I remember being in Sunday school in first grade and being like, yes, Jesus is the son of God. And that was it for a while. It was more of answering the teacher's questions and knowing all the stories in the bible. It wasn't until I got to high school that something changed. I had one sunday school teacher who actually asked us if we were baptized. And I wasn't. He wondered why. I answered that I felt like I wasn't ready. And he told me that that was one of the works of the devil, to make one think they aren't ready to be baptized. Someone used the saying "You can go down (as in the water for baptism) and come back up as a wet devil." Baptism is just the outside expression of what has already happened on the inside. So I can proud to say that I did get baptized by the end of that year. January 1, 2006 with two of my very good friends. After that I went through a lot of temptation but luckily I had some strong moral values or I would not be the person I am today. Once I got to college, one of the things I wanted was to find a good Christian group to be apart of and I found that. I went through more things but just kept growing in faith. God brings these trial around so that you can grow, so that you can learn and stand strong against the attacks of the enemy. Not saying that you'll perfect, we're only human. But you can remember back to those times where God has helped you, brought you through crisis after crisis and maybe use those experiences to help others. That is what I believe.